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How To Make A Change In Life | FNBB 98
Deciding to make a big, impactful life change is hard, especially when you have been in a comfortable spot for any length of time. And it could be anything, change in hairstyle, change in relationship status, change in location, and/or a career change late in life. We’ve had that last one happening over here.
After working in a corporate healthcare setting for most of his career, Mike has decided to leave it behind and strike out on a new entrepreneurial path. But it hasn’t been without literal months of discussion, angst, worry, and guilt. But he did it, giving notice to work last week. It has been the end of one long chapter and the beginning of hopefully another.
Change is good for the soul. It’s how we learn and grow and begin to push ourselves to limits we didn’t know we were capable of. But some people will hang on to an old situation for familiarity and ease sake until it is causing them more pain than pleasure.
I believe that even asking yourself if you should make a change is a sure sign that you should, or at least give it some serious thought. It is not an internal discussion that you should avoid. Even if you don’t do it, an honest discussion will help you determine if it needs to happen eventually, but this isn’t the right time. It will prepare you to begin to determine a deadline that may feel more appropriate or comfortable.
Sometimes change is an absolute MUST and if you’ve ever been there, you know exactly what I mean.
At our age, big decisions take time and planning. We are all old enough and have roots so deep that we realize that real change requires massive tending. Do you have people that depend on you for things that they receive from you in your current situation? How would that have to change? Are there legal issues that must be dealt with? Are there financial implications that have to be budgeted and figured out?
It is just too easy to give up on this big change before even starting, knowing all the hard work that must be done to make it happen. Or we overthink and sweat all the details at this stage. Should I be doing this? Wouldn’t it be easier to just keep the status quo? What if it is a mistake? What if it doesn’t work out? These questions are natural and they are going to happen no matter how firm you are in this decision. You just have to be solid in it and know that the personal blowback will come.
Nothing ever goes according to plan. Like nothing. There will always be at least one surprise or two. Make sure to stay fluid in your decision and plan for change. Don’t try to force that square peg into a round hole. A change will happen, especially if you want it, but there is give and take at every turn.
Learn to be flexible with your time, your schedule, your money, and your energy. What you put out will come back to benefit you, no matter if you had to deviate from the original plan, so stay the course. You’ll get there, but maybe through the side door instead of the front.
Just because you’ve made up your mind and are taking steps toward a change doesn’t mean you are home-free. Our brains are wired to keep us safe and if we are out making waves and trying new things, the mind generates thoughts of, “Are you sure you want to do this? Wouldn’t it be easier to just keep doing what we’ve always done?”
Your mind means well, but it is most definitely generating self-sabotaging thoughts. When it begins to make you question yourself and the decisions you are making, then it is winning. Be aware of these thoughts and put them in their place when they come up.
On the inspiration series on the Redesigning Midlife podcast last week, I talked to my friend Suzanne Webster about how opportunities for change come always when we are not quite ready for them. And as she explained, sometimes you have to take the chance even when you aren’t ready because that opportunity isn’t going to wait for the “right time”.
You just have to face the fear and imagine what can happen if you say “yes” to change. There are amazing things on the other side of that word if you can just let go of saying “no” for a change.
If you know yourself, who you are, what you want, and believe in your decision, then change, even big changes, will come easier. I often say that we all only have one life and you never know when that life will be cut short for whatever reason, so you owe it to yourself to take chances, live fully, and make a change when you need it.
Mike is making a career pivot into work he has never done before. He is starting a new career in a business franchise of his own. It is a dream he has had for years. It would have been so easy to just stay in corporate until retirement, but then he would have used up his one life being comfortable, but unhappy and unsatisfied. Nobody wants that. Nobody deserves that.
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